Hurricane Floosie.

Everyone can take a deep breath: as of this morning, the hurricane the was threatening us has pretty much dissipated due to high atmosphere shearing. In other words, Flossie turned out to be a Floosie.

By the way, how was Flossie chosen as a name for a hurricane? For that matter, how was Flossie approved as a name for anything other than a teddy bear in a dentist's office? Jeff and I were half hoping that Butter Bean would decide to make an arrival at the same time of the hurricane (you know, for the story) but that would then almost require us to name Butter Bean after the storm and there's NO WAY I would name my child Flossie. Unless, of course, she arrived with one or more teeth already in. Then it would be out of my hands.

Which reminds me, in my first act as a parent, I'm going to ask a favor of you all: if August 25 comes and goes without so much as a squeak from Mr. or Miss Bean, please do not call us to comment on the fact that the baby hasn't arrived. It's not that we don't want to hear from you, we do. But we need to teach the little one that working your family and friends into a tizzy over your arrival is just trashy attention-seeking behavior. We will not have any of it. Instead, we will ignore the fact that Butter Bean has not arrived yet. We will go out and do fun things. We will laugh hard at jokes that aren't really that funny. We will exclaim, "Wow! It's really fun out here doing these fun things! We're so glad we get to have so much fun." This tactic will be effective on two fronts: Jeff and I will probably get our minds off the fact that my body has very literally been taken over by a strong, fast-growing alien AND maybe the alien will hear us and decide that surrender is the best option.

Seriously people, we're going to need your help if this is going to work. I already tried to turn the temperature up on the little one with this weekend's fever, but I think s/he just thought we went to the spa. I bounced the guy around with sneezes and coughs, but s/he wouldn't budge, except to kick me really hard to express dislike of the bouncing. So we've got our work set out for us if we're going to convince Butter Bean that the outside world is better than the liquid heaven in which s/he's living now. Wish us luck ... and don't worry, we'll let you know as soon as s/he arrives!